We Sail Through Our Youth So Impatiently

Okay so. Short post today. I have tests in Latin & Economics tomorrow. But I DESPERATELY need to plug the new Vanessa Carlton CD.

It. Is. AMAZING.

There are songs on here that don't even really relate to me.
But somehow they do.
Like.
Okay. The song, "Come Undone" has a line that made me tear up for no apparent reason the first time I heard it. I had to pause it. And just sit for a second.

"There are people in this lifetime
That we should never meet.
'Cause to be here now without you,
Well, my life's so incomplete.
I'll tell you what you mean to me
And maybe then you'll see."

That whole verse just struck me. Especially the first line. Just. Wow.

And her piano playing. CHRIST. She is amazing. I will probably be listening to nothing but this CD for a week. It is that great. She's like the John Mayer of the piano. Just unbelievable.

And to think that an hour ago I thought I was going to listening to nothing but The Used this week. Life really is full of très magnifique surprises.

But most of all:

Music, I salute you.

A Romantic's Lament (In Which I Waste Time That I Do Not Have)

I want to sleep. I should try. I might try. But I know it's no use.
Thoughts of him won't let me be.
Dammit, boy.
Why can't my heart behave?
"They're so cute together."
Well. Yes. They are.
But that doesn't make it easier to see them walking, side-by-side.
He's always smiling at her.
She's always smiling back.
I'm sure they talk about everything.
Not just one, stupid dead language.
He talks to her about lots of other things.
Because he enjoys talking to her.
That's all I ask for.
Not for what they have.
But that maybe he'd enjoy talking to me too.
If only a little bit.
Please?


Such poetic sadness. I should slap myself. That wasn't even meant to be a poem. I just started breaking the lines off. I think it's because I'm used to writing like that now. Arg. The shorter lines don't mean less of the truth, though. I miss him. Right now. I miss his face. Even though I'll see it for another 45 minutes straight tomorrow, and 55 for the two days after that.
It's borderline creepy. Actually. It's probably completely creepy. He doesn't know, of course. But I feel creepy. And utterly powerless. I hate it. It's unfair. Why can't my heart dwell on someone attainable? Someone that I can pursue without the bittersweet taste of regret already filling my senses. It tastes/smells/feels/looks/sounds like cyanide and the sky just before it rains.

It's strangely enticing.
I hate it.


Until next time,
When my heart,
If all goes well,
Will be behaving itself.

-Zanzibar George

Where Has All the Content Gone?

Not much going on. I'm going to post a poem or two after a survey. Damn The Nanny. She tagged me. And everyone else. So here it is. All of my dark secrets revealed by the time I count to 12. Only not:

1.) What I was doing ten years ago: Being a crazy second grader. You know how we do.
2.) Five years ago: Being miserable. Moving schools is really not fun. Yar.
3.) One year ago: Trying not to die from the sudden shock that is junior year.
4.) Yesterday: Probably nothing.
5.) 5 snacks I enjoy: Pocky. Honey toast. Cheetos. Pirouettes. Reese's.
6.) 5 Things I would do if I suddenly had $100 million: Buy at least one horse. Buy a ranch. Complete the collections of all my fandoms.
7.) 5 locations I would like to run away to: Whitefish. Narnia. Hogwarts. MCR's tour bus. Behind the veil.
8.) 5 bad habits I have: Touching my face. Biting my cuticles. Being ADD. Staying up too late. Taking life too fast.
9.) 5 things I like doing: Reading. Watching anime. Fangirling. Being with Sidera. Writing.
10.) 5 TV shows I like: Will & Grace. The Office. Naruto. Prison Break. Law & Order: SVU.
11.) 5 things I hate doing: Homework. Being fake. Feeling guilty. Feeling close-minded. Fighting with people I love.
12.) 5 Biggest joys of the moment: Sidera. Love. Music. The solitude my mind provides. Hope.



That was fun. Er. Or something. Now for some poetry. Everyone got their berets? Well then, let us begin:

Iris

Where Iris sprawls in peaceful symphonia,

The colors mingle in euphoric grace.

Dip your brush into the clashing hues:

Dole out plums dyed deep with wine.

Let the reddest of peppers lick fire to your tongue.

Coat yourself with cultured beige.

Snatch the pearly sweetness of each pastry.

Immerse your world in make-believe cacti dreams.

A deluge of sensory ecstasy.

All in a moment—

Grow close to distant minds—

All in a glance—

Let the canvas spirit your senses away—

Away in a flash of colorful understanding.

Lalalala. Next one.

Inside

The wind gropes,

Through darkness.

I know it will find us.

But I am not afraid.

Holding her

Holding me.

We clutch in vain

At the warmth of those fires.

After Zephyrus has caressed

Untold fissures of our limbs,

He will know:

It is not his touch that makes us quake.

Our beating hearts

Match the beating drums.

Betraying no answers.

But we are not afraid.

Post-Weekend Stress Disorder

Whyyyyyyy must it be Sunday? Why must it ALWAYS be Sunday? Sunday is a rotten day. Sitting there, all spiffy after Saturday. Why is it at the beginning of a new week on a calendar, hm? What's so wrong with putting Saturday there. At least people LIKE Saturday. Sunday, on the other hand. Sunday just fails.

Wow. I need a life. Really. Ranting about Sunday? Tis a bit sad, loves, don't you think? Moving on? Great idea!

I didn't get to see D. or The Nanny this weekend. Travesty, I know. I miss them. I mean I'll see D. tomorrow, but it's not the same as getting to see her 1) with The Nanny and 2) on a weekend. I was looking forward to playing something that I could actually maybe not come in last at. Oh wells. Taboo and that... other one... are fun. Sidera and I will just have to practice. Someday. Someday we'll win. Or at least. Lose by much less than we did last time.

Not a lot happened this weekend. I did get to hang out with some old friends. We'll call them F. and P. I love them both dearly, but we've kinda lost touch over the past year or so. We were supposed to go shopping on Friday, but P. got off work kinda late and F.'s coach gave her team a speech after their game that kinda dragged on. We finally did get together, along with one other person that I'm kinda friends with, but not really. I really like her though. I shall call her Lo. Because I can. Lo actually ended up kind of being an icebreaker of sorts. For some reason I felt less out of place with her in the car. Probably because I feel so guilty that I never call P. or F. anymore. Our interests are different, as are our hobbies. It's hard to explain, but I guess the easiest example is that they like to drink (a lot), and I don't. Generally this doesn't make me uncomfortable, but for some reason it stands out with the two of them. I guess because it marks that we really have become such different people since we became friends, as opposed to me making friends with them as they are now.

That paragraph is very confusing. No matter. Pretend it's not, cap'n.

The only shopping we did was at Ele.ctr.ic Bou.tiq.ue. Yes. That's right. I went in there. I was in there for over an hour. I didn't try anything on. Dear god. I can't really see myself wearing anything in there. I was tempted to buy some fishnets, just to have them, but I decided not to. Same with false eyelashes. I wouldn't be able to put those on. I'd just end up spearing myself in the eyeball. I could be wrong, but that could be potentially problematic. They were getting stuff for the Saturday night's dance. All three of them bought something: F. got a mini-(mini-mini-mini-)skirt, and Lo & P. got matching dresses in different colors. I'm sure they looked groovy last night.

Alrighty. Going to shower. And not eat waffles. T-T
Wow. This is a beastly long entry. I win.
Next weekend, loves. Next weekend.
Peace out, sporks!

-Zanzibar George

New Mexico, Here I Come

Hi lovers.

Alrighty. First real post. I can't remember the last time I wrote a blog entry. Probably in my Xanga. Which was kinda pointless. But hey. Somethingsomething.

Basically The Nanny, D., Sidera, and I are going to have our four secret little blogs and feel super cool and being secret agents or something with them. Or maybe just write stuff. And be like "THE SUN IS SHINING IN NEW MEXICO TODAY, Blake!"

Ugh. College. I am not going to get in anywhereeeee. Someone kill me now. Siriusly. I hate life. I want to go somewhere big, liberal, and Asian-friendly. Is that so much to ask for?

Anywhosit. Going to spaz over that. Later alligators.

-Zanzibar George
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Now playing: The Used - Find a Way
via FoxyTunes

Like a Puma

Pounce away, dear heart.
-Z.

P.S. I heart The Nanny. Even if I tried to distract her.